UNIVERISTY & ADULT YEARS:
Twin siblings may still struggle even as university students with such issues as: living arrangements, individual friendships & friendships shared with their sibling(s), career / academic choices, lifestyle, and romantic relationships. These choices are not only personal, but often involve their sibling and affect the sibling relationship.
CAREER / PROFESSIONAL CONCERNS: Even though career and professional development begins in the years following traditional school, the struggles and choices often play a pivotal role in the university and adulthood.
Siblings need to reconcile how the demands of employment can be balanced with family and lifestyle choices. They may prefer to exercise more control over career than over where they will live (geographic location) or schedules. Choices will need to be focused on how and how often they will see family (friends). As always, choices are often a matter of negotiation and balancing individual wants and needs with those of one’s sibling(s) and family.
PARTNERSHIP, MARRIAGE & INTIMACY: Personal major life choices will likely occur in the early adulthood years. One may become more serious with relationships as one chooses to pair bond and settle into a job and form roots in a particular community. These bring new commitments that compete for one’s time and previous choices. The sibling relationship will be impacted as well.
Family decisions, although complicated on many levels, can be a driving force that actually improves the communication among siblings. Sharing many of the same concerns and challenges can bring siblings closer together. So, in some instances, siblings actually choose to live closer to each other to be able to share more the important family and personal lifestyle choices.
In a similar way, other major life events, such as moving / relocating, having children, changing jobs / occupations, illnesses, or deaths in the family can become the main focus in our adult years. For siblings these are times of great stress, but also of great support and communication. Same-age siblings often find great comfort in acknowledging and assisting each other in such difficult times.
So, at every level and stage, same-age siblings face many challenges and opportunities to deepen the bond they share. They also find that communication is essential, even though it may be uniquely their own style and frequency.