PRESCHOOL – EARLY YEARS
Multiples may be more likely to experience delays in speech and language development, and we have provided a language inventory to help parents monitor language development.
Below are some of the other areas to observe and some guide questions that will help evaluate social and emotional development of siblings before they enter formal school settings.
Other concerns to watch for include:
- Developmental Delays / Differences (Physical or Cognitive)
- Dominance: Is one twin more dominant? Is one twin more dependent?
- Independence: Do siblings spend time apart and cultivate individual interests?
- Sibling Relations: Do they generally get along or need time alone?
- Social Ability: How do they play with other children in their peer group?
- Academic Needs: Is one twin in need of specialized academic support?
- Emotional / Social adjustments: Do they make friends and play well with peers?
- How do they handle disappointment, anger, rejection? Do twins console each other?
EARLY SCHOOL YEARS
PLACEMENT: The most common questions we are often asked is: Together or apart? This is on the minds of parents as they plan for the early formal school years, usually known as Reception, Foundation Stage One, Kindergarten and early grades (around the ages of 5 – 7).
The best policy is a flexible policy for the placement of twins and multiples in school, especially in the early years of formal schooling. After grade three (age 7 – 8), it appears to make less of a difference, but for the majority of siblings, sharing the same classroom and having the same teacher is preferable and beneficial. Of course, the placement decision should be made with evidence in hand and rational minds. There may be some siblings who would perform and function better in separate classrooms – particularly if they are highly competitive or one is always dominant. So making the decision based on the needs of the siblings and their situation is important.
There are benefits and limitations to either placement decision, therefore it’s necessary to weigh those against the needs of the siblings individually, as well as, as a pair. Some of the following questions can help guide the placement decision:
- Getting to know my teacher (and my sibling’s teacher, if not in the same classroom)
- Will I get to see / work with my brother / sister twin?
- What if my sibling is ill and not in school? (What if my sibling is seriously ill / hurt?)
- What if my teacher thinks we are alike? Will they get to know me?
- Will I have my own individual friends?
- How does my teacher compare me and my sibling?
- Will I get to see my sibling during the school day? At recess? At lunch?
- Will I see my sibling during before school / after school events? Will we share bus rides or participate together in extracurricular events?
We have provided Dr. Preedy’s checklist on placement to help parents, teachers and administrators evaluate and make a professional decision based on evidence and observations. It’s important to use an empirical approach whenever one makes such important decision.
The following are other elements that require consideration by teachers and administrators for same-age siblings. They point out many of the differences among siblings and their unique needs. It’s important to realize that each set of siblings should be evaluated on it’s own merits and unique experiences. Therefore, again, it’s necessary to have a flexible policy when considering their academic needs.
Boy / Girl Siblings and dizygotic Pairs? Usually, boy / girl twins and dizygotic (fraternal) pairs have fewer issues or adjustment challenges in the school setting. However, again, there is the need to evaluate the situation and evidence to determine the best possible placement in the school setting. Even though fraternal twins may not look similar, they often do share a much stronger emotional bond than other non-twin siblings. That bond should be recognized and understood as a very important part of their young brains and developing personalities.
Delayed Siblings? Sometimes one sibling in a twin pair may need extra help or services due to developmental or learning needs. This is an important consideration in the school setting and may impact the placement decision and options. However, even though the focus may be one child’s specialized needs, both children should be brought into the conversation so each may understand and feel apprised of the situation. Siblings separated for specialized educational tutoring or services will still need to know when and where each other is and may engage in “checking behaviors.” Checking behaviors are those times when one sibling will look up, or make an effort to go and check on what the other is doing. In doing so, one feels comforted and safer. It’ s similar to how parents periodically check on the whereabouts and safety of their own children. This is more common among same-age siblings and higher order multiples in every age group. Some adult twins report such incidents of needing / wanting to check in on siblings, which many reported was the exact time it was critical time for the one who was being contacted / checked on.
Illness? Prolonged periods of illness or injury where one sibling is unable to attend school may have unintended consequences for the healthy sibling. Teachers need to realize that the twin bond can strongly influence how emotionally involved siblings are. That when one is in great need, their sibling will probably be emotionally affected as well.
Higher Multiples (Triplets, Quadruplets, etc.) The school placement decision may be just as important, and even more complicated. Because here we have to consider not only more individuals and their specific needs, but also the relations among the siblings themselves. For example, are some more likely to function independently from siblings? Are there some who are overly dependent upon each other? Do any of them have special needs? What can the school accommodate? Can they all start school in the same classroom? Are the classrooms physically close in the same area of the building? These are some of the considerations that may impact decisions made for multiples.